Convert To Islam...

G Fresh · Post by **G Fresh** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 10:48 am

...and win back your right to smoke in quasi-public. Because, you know Muslims are free-born adults who can weigh the â€œcultural valueâ€

bassjones · Post by **bassjones** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 11:32 am

ding.ding.ding. lightbulb moment. I'm starting a new religion, one that specifically requires all members to smoke, especially when drinking alcohol and listening to live music. Let's see John Crawford stop that one!

Garr · Post by **Garr** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 12:01 pm

It is not hard at all to be ordained. Good idea, but it may take some time to build, and then, likely, you'd only be able to practice in your place of worship.

sevesd93 · Post by **sevesd93** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 12:57 pm

Garr wrote:...you'd only be able to practice in your place of worship.

Which would be a public bar.

G Fresh · Post by **G Fresh** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 12:59 pm

sevesd93 wrote:
Garr wrote:...you'd only be able to practice in your place of worship.
Which would be a public bar.

...with a 5 dollar cover char--errr, offering and 20 different "communion beverages" on tap.

Garr · Post by **Garr** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:04 pm

You just have to name the deity after me.

New currency: In Garr We Trust.
New Latin: E pluribus Garrum
New anthem: One nation, under Garr, indivisible. . .
New Oath: Do you swear to Garr that you will tell the truth, the whole truth, and. . .
New colloquialisms: Apollo, this is Houston. Garrspeed to you. Come back soon
New cussing: Garr damn you!

The_Dude · Post by **The_Dude** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:06 pm

Don't forget the crappy band, Garrsmack.

Garr · Post by **Garr** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:13 pm

The_Dude wrote:Don't forget the crappy band, Garrsmack.

Garrsolutely!

or this:

Aero · Post by **Aero** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:17 pm

Garr should arrest himself for counterfeiting

WBOB · Post by **WBOB** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:21 pm

Where one could go to a Garrfessional afterwords.

Garr · Post by **Garr** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:24 pm

The main purpose of the Garrfessional would be to pick up the line on loose and adulterous women. They have a special place reserved in the Kingdom of Garr.

lbanks · Post by **lbanks** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:26 pm

bassjones wrote:ding.ding.ding. lightbulb moment. I'm starting a new religion, one that specifically requires all members to smoke, especially when drinking alcohol and listening to live music. Let's see John Crawford stop that one!

Add eat donut to that and we've got a deal!

sevesd93 · Post by **sevesd93** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:29 pm

So in the Garrfessional, would there be a glory hole?

Garr · Post by **Garr** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:37 pm

All of the glory of the hole would be found in the Garrfessional. Fo sho!

Those who are regular tithers would be added to the schedule to hear Garrfessions. I can't hog all the glory for myself.

The_Dude · Post by **The_Dude** » Thu Sep 27, 2007 1:40 pm

sevesd93 wrote:So in the Garrfessional, would there be a glory hole?

Aptly named the "Garryhole".